Heyyyy

So, blogging has taken a back burner to literally everything else right now. But I am currently sitting in a booth waiting for my next cue. I'm running spotlight for Oklahoma! at my school. I've never run spotlight before. Ever. Not even in high school. It just was not something I ever did. I did however run light board and a little bit of sound board. But yeah. That is where life has me at the moment. And I got denied to do my own show in our student directing lab. So someone else is going to be the main contact for it but it will still be my show which is exciting because I want people to see it. I want people to come and see what I can do and having written something that is completely my style but completely out my ordinary repertoire. It's dark and sad and not at all what I usually write and it's awesome! But just like any other person I am so critical of my own work that I know I can make it better. But for now it's awesome. I'm really excited to see it take off. On another hand I'm loving living in my own apartment. Sometimes it gets crazy but it's nice being so close to campus and work. Speaking of work they are really good about working with me and they know that I'm valuable so they keep me and the pay is good too so it's not too bad. =] Other than some stressful days it's been a pretty good couple of weeks.

Meh

I'm moving. To fairborn. To be closer to school. I bought a puppy. His name is Jack. He is a Pyrenees and an Australian Shepard mix. I'll post photos later. And I have real responsibilities. Like rent. And utilities. And I'm scared out of my mind. I'm terrified that I won't be able to do it. I'm scared because I'm leaving my home of 9 years. I'm scared because I'm at a really awkward place in lifr where I need my fiance and my mom and they are both in seperate cities. With Jess being in fairborn and mom being here in jamestown. My mom has been the only solid figure throughout my whole life and I have no idea what I'm going to do without her. She is my hero. She raised me after my dad passed and was there and loved me. She is that mom that's always there when you need her and I'm really going to miss her. But now I also have Jessa and it breaks my heart to be away from her. I'm so torn between wanting to stay with my mom forever and living my own life. The song landslide aort of describes my life right noq because I have built my life around these two women. I know that moving on with my life is what's best. I know that when I'm rich my mom will be living in her own wing of my mansion but its just sad right now.